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If I hear one more person refer to a father being with his kids as “babysitting” or that “he helps so much with household chores”. Stop. You mean he also raises his children and takes care of the needed work for the household he lives in? That should be a bare minimum given, not something extra special that deserves particular praise.
Okay- so who’s responsible for the financial success of the family, the majority of the household expenses, like cars, mortgage, vacations, food, etc. Who’s fixing appliances, plumbing, household repairs, renovations, yardwork, car maintenance, errands and protecting the family? Who’s bearing the stress of climbing the corporate ladder and making the most money possible, setting aside funds for the kids futures? Dad, that’s who. If working women are burnt out, they can change their situation. Work less and spend less, don’t accumulate debts and stop buying stuff all the time. Stop overscheduling kids activities, have family meetings to divide chores. Teach kids responsibilities- they are capable of learning how to clean and cook. Families that work and play together, stay together. Of course, Dad can cook or clean regularly too. It can all be scheduled and organized. A lot of these women bitching are not working full time, the martyr sob story is getting old. If things are so bad, own up to your part in creating the situation. Women want perfection and everything done their way- that is a problem. They also want to spend money extravagently or unnecessarily. Stop with the victim mentality already and own up to the part you played in your unhappiness and give your man some credit instead of calling him useless. 🤨🤔🥴
@@lizze490 “stop buying stuff all the time” Jesus Christ, not that ancient stereotype. First of all, men make more money solely because they’re a man. Second of all, how in the hell is making more money an excuse to not be involved in your kids life, never cook or do any other house chores that women have to do on the DAILY?? Not to mention usually the woman works AS WELL. This is ridiculous
@@lizze490 Why do you assume working women aren’t responsible for the financial success of the family?
In 2023?
Troubleshooting appliances is something anyone can do. There’s a level at which a little more technical skill is needed, but there’s jobs that exist for that. Same with car maintenance — everyone needs to do the basics, but mechanics exist for a reason. This applies to everything on this list. Yardwork is a very small percentage of household chores. I don’t have a yard so it’s not an issue for me rn lol 😅
For women to be able to do less, men have to do more. It’s the only way 50/50 will work– many studies have looked into this. Women work in jobs and then come home and do the majority of household tasks. The amount of time spent working by the average woman– in paid and unpaid labour– exceeds the average man’s count by many many hours.
Until this equalises, women will feel taken advantage of. Women will suffer ill health they shouldn’t. Women will burn out faster. Women will not earn as much at their jobs because they simply do not have enough hours in the day to work more.
@@lizze490 The breadwinner. More than half the time, that is us women.
Because men laugh and say earning degrees and credentials is “worthless” as a way to excuse their own laziness. Turns out, employers disagree with the XYs on the value of those “worthless” degrees and credentials. Crazy, right?
@@dianaprince3176 how should the dynamic be when the husband makes $350k/yr and the wife doesn’t work?
I had to tell my bf “I’m not doing both” I told him ill either be the working wife that doesn’t cook and barely cleansing or the housewife that doesn’t work but both aren’t an option.
Men expect a soft and gentle woman but don’t provide a soft and gentle life.
Okay so does that mean the boyfriend should then be the working husband that doesn’t cook and barely cleans so who’s going to clean I mean both of you are barely cleaning and not cooking or is it that you have to have no job and then you’ll stay home take care of the house but if you have a job just like your boyfriend has a job he has to do all the stuff I feel sorry for him hopefully he leaves you
@@Starbug11 okay so you literally have the text right here and you did it wrong No one said all doesn’t cook and barely cleans so the working wife that does not cook and barely cleans That’s not splitting things I mean I don’t even know what to say to your comment
If you have the ability to read which apparently don’t or maybe you do but you do not have the ability to comprehend she’s literally says up here and I know I’m repeating myself I just I don’t know what else to do I’ll either be the working wife that doesn’t cook and barely cleans That’s not splitting that’s I’m going to work but I’m not going to cook and I’m not going to clean so the husband’s supposed to work and cook and do the majority of the cleaning
And as I said work work not the same thing if the husband’s a roofer and the wife’s secretary at a doctor’s office they are in no way she perform the same work
You don’t say while we’re going to split things at home because we’re both working No you’re not both working The husband in my example here is doing a ton of physical labor while the wife realistically could use the physical labor of cleaning and cooking because the job is sitting down all day
@@Starbug11 then she has more time and a less demanding job than the man just stop trying sitting at a screen as a secretary is mentally demanding like a roofer is physically
The fact that you even try to compare those two jobs just shows how clean this you are as to what is involved.
Today Sunday this is probably the first Sunday in a year and a half maybe more I did nothing.
I literally sad from a computer screen for 12 hours you know what was mentally demanding about that me knowing I got nothing done today.
The most mentally demanding thing about that was I did not work.
I specifically said secretary you can be very hard pressed to find any secretarial job that’s mentally demanding to the point that you can compare it to someone up on a roof
Problem is you likely have no clue of physical labor is like so you’re trying to compare physical labor to again a secretary mental labor…
The biggest labor you have in that is getting yelled at by a customer.
You still ignore and I’m on a phones we can’t go back You’re ignoring what this person said they were not going to fully do you keep trying to defend 50/50 becoming I’m not going to do this if both people are working and that one person’s refusing to do something Where’s the 50/50 The only thing mentally demanding is dealing with a woman it really is you have to be one
@@Starbug11 wow men can go to school and set themselves up for a less demanding job well first off if they all did that you’d have no infrastructure and second off trades which are physically demanding are very well paying.
You got no clue you got non-stop of the trying to justify I don’t know about being a secretary I run my own business I have to answer the phone I have to deal with the customers I have to write the bills I have to do the work I do everything I’m a one-man show and you’re going to try to tell me I don’t know what it’s like to answer the phone or look at a computer screen
Let me make sure I go and do the housework after I get back from being out for 24 hours in a truck plowing snow yeah I mean you know it’s not physically demanding job or no I should go to school and get a better education so I don’t have to do that and then I can just sit around or something.
Your answer here was literally let’s society collapse men should just not do the difficult job so they can do work at home and women don’t have to do it.
If you have time to go to the gym and here’s what maybe you don’t comprehend it’s possible to not have any time see here’s the difference
I know two people there together so woman takes care of the kids cleans the house goes to work not for a huge number of hours The guy is probably at work at 7:30 a.m. and might still be working at 11:30 p.m. so you just tell me when that person’s going to go to the gym.
Again what you’re not able to comprehend I gave him a hand one time we started at 8:30 in the morning we meaning I was involved despite not working 8:30 a.m. I went home at 11:30 p.m. to do laundry.
I didn’t whine oh my God I can’t do this That’s it I work I can’t do the laundry.
Can you still can’t accept this woman wanted to work and then not to anything at home not split it 50/50 not do anything and that’s the key thing that you just refuse to accept it’s in text it’s wrote down there’s nothing to interpret The words sentence the phrase whatever it was not if I work we’re going to split things 50/50 it was that appear if I work I’m not doing blank
@Matt Lane wtf obviously they can pay for that labor to be done. I’m sad that you’ve probably tricked a woman into being your maid/work horse and I hope she breaks free.
No one deserves
My ex husband believed “50/50” meant money. ONLY. And regularly called out that I made less money. While raising four kids under four and yes him too. So when that dynamic switched and I made a hella lot more money than him I did the passive aggressive thing of redirecting his exact behavior back to him. He didn’t take that well. He honestly thought I would continue managing him AND the family AND the breadwinning too. So glad I’m 40 single and so so happy to be appreciated by ME instead of torn down for my every shortcoming.
Good for you, queen 👑 👍. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
This is yet another reason I am *so glad* to be childfree.
@@iamcasihart you are wise… I encouraged my four from very young to take care of themselves… Too much pressure out there on women to be what everyone else needs and wants and go fulfilling roles that really aren’t natural or conducive to happiness. Divorcing Mr 50/50 was the best decision I ever made. Turns out my 50% was a whole lot more like 98%<
Better to be 40 and single, then 40 and miserable because of someone else indefinitely.
@@trophyscene5015 110% my life is so much better. So much MORE. Than I ever imagined. We’ve got to do better as a society raising girls, heck boys too. We are still perpetuating bad decisions like marriage when it isn’t always a good idea. As a girl growing up I put too much stock in being validated by other people, as teenagers girls start looking to men to validate their worth. Then the final nail that birthing children makes you a “real woman”. I’m not the only female to fall into this societal trap. I’m always shocked though at the ones who make it a repeat cycle.
I told my husband, “You’re off from work, not off from being a husband, father, and homeowner. Your off from work, not off from life.”
real AND true
Good for you!
🙌🏼
Need to tell partner that. Actually a partner not the right word , a partner knows of pre set expectations and should not rely on me to do all. I wfh have more flexibility yes and I also work while taking care of our child. My break is after bed time his , when out the shower straight to couch😌 rant i know . There’s a lot to unpack here but in general it’s not just culture and gender roles but how society still puts these unrealistic, unsustainable, unsupported expectations on stay at home parents especially women! Let’s raise our future babies better✌🏽
People who work need a full day off. It’s not fair for either party to be always on the clock. My husband and I are introverts so it was easy to understand that we needed to give each other alone time.
I was 22 years old when a coworker said
i don’t wanna be the super woman/ super mum/ super wife I just wanna be me.
It’s been living in my head rent free for 3 years
This!!!…
Trust me, being super dad/super man/super husband brings me all of my joy. My job that I love pails in comparison. 22 is so young and impressionable. Do not carry their words with you. All of us rise to any Occassion, and rising to the Occassion for your family is so amazing, it’s grace. Rose to the Occassion at work? meh.
@@loganspahr7314 kids and work are not the only two things that exist in life. Being *you*, doing things you enjoy, spending time with found family, etc. are entirely acceptable ways of life. Do not press your own values on others.
@@loganspahr7314 true. It’s a lot of responsibility to have children and make marriage work. If anyone does not want to have that responsibility, unfortunately they will think about themselves first. It’s better that they don’t have children or a marriage until or if they are ready if that is the case. I chose marriage and family. An example of this type of thinking is that everyone wanted a pet during the pandemic but afterwards didn’t want the responsibility of taking care of it when things started getting back to normal. The shelters are overwhelmed with discarded animals no longer needed for getting to go outside. If people can’t make a commitment to a pet for 10 years or more, should they even have children in the first place? I’m grateful to be a wife and mother to our children. It’s been hard due to various circumstances that they have had to deal with but it’s part of the package. I wouldn’t exchange any one of them. But I had my first at 31 after meeting my husband at 29. I was definitely “ready”. My oldest will be 22 in August. My youngest is 14.
@@nicolettehare3322 are people really “thinking of themselves first” if they believe they wouldn’t make good partners nor parents? Sounds like they’re being considerate not dragging others down a dead end road
This is what’s keeping me from buying a house with my boyfriend. The minute we started discussing living together he said he hoped I would put sandwiches in the fridge for him every morning. Parents, start demanding more from your sons. Teach them to run a household on their own EARLY on. A 10 year old can perfectly vacuum their room and make soup for dinner.
Leave him!
I find sandwiches such a funny choice because they’re so easy to make? He can make it himself easy, lol.
My boyfriend and I live together and will often cook separately because we’re both picky eaters in different ways. I
@@billyndagriffith2897 That depends on how it’s asked though. The person above said that that was their boyfriend’s IMMEDIATE comment and implied that it wasn’t a joke, that would put me off too. If it was a discussion however, and was decided fairly, that’s different.
Firstly, don’t move in with a boyfriend. If he isn’t in a position to marry you, he’s a man-child – and guess who’ll be his momma! Secondly, you say to him you can’t wait to go part-time at work so you have time to pack his sandwiches.
@@billyndagriffith2897 I’m so glad you mentioned this! You are right on the money!
Something I’ve learned in life. Before one goes throwing a relationship out, make sure you’re evaluating things with a clear view from both perspectives. Does your partner do things for you, do they have chores/maintenance that you don’t do? Also, there are times when life throws difficult things on our partner’s plate (death of family, laid off job, medical issues) where they can’t keep all the balls in the air. We have to do a little extra to keep things going. If you can look back and say that your partner has done the same for you at times, then you have a good thing. If your partner doesn’t do things for you, chores that you don’t do, or hasn’t picked up the slack when you’ve had too much on your plate, then you need to have some truthful, but loving conversations. If those aren’t fruitful over time, then perhaps you have a lemon.
Aside from cheating, this is 100% why women leave their husbands and why single women are happier than single men. Extra burden is removed from the woman while the man has to do things on his own. Sometimes, it is just easier and less exhausting to be single as a woman even as a parent.
Not only that but I’ve heard so many stories from women I know who are divorced with children about how they love that now they can drop their children with their husbands on the weekends and they go out and party, date, have brunch with girlfriends, etc. and the ex-husband who barely was there for his kids before is now forced to deal with them all weekend long! Which also really bites for his social life and dating lol.
Until the kids a teenager. I think kids need and require more from their mother when they are young and more from their fathers when they are teens and people need to make sacrifices to raise kids. Not give up halfway through.
@@imaginator333 I am not really sure what this comment contributes to my original statement? Or is it a response to the other person? Either way, I really don’t know how any of the above would be considered “giving up halfway through.” Leaving a marriage is not leaving children…or am I missing something here? In my case, my child actually has a better relationship with his father after the split since his dad has to engage with him (something he didn’t do when we were together since he expected me to do everything) while he is at his house. We co-parent much better apart than when we were together. 🤷 Further, I am confused about your idea of ages when it comes to a child’s needs. They benefit from both parents throughout their life. I don’t really think one is ever needed more than another if the parent in question is doing their part raising them. Please note, I am not criticizing your comment nor am I offended by. Just confused about the point/logic behind it, especially when trying to connect it to the comments above?
That’s what my mum says too, she was a single mum and even though she had to work full-full-time labour jobs and raising 2 kids and 1 cat on her own, she says that’s better than having a useless man around.
@@Charlie.Morningstar-justkatyes! Like my husband is so hands on with his ten year old when he has her and is always going things for her (she’s ten but he will had to cut up her food for her and her room is the only one he cleans??) But he does nothing like that for our TWO year old! What? Like he’ll be so much more helpful if I dump him 😅
I’m surrounded by married female doctors … these women work 60+ hours a week including multiple 24-hour shifts every month. And they also do around 70% of the child care and house work. IT’S INSANE. These are smart extremely capable women married to men who don’t pull their share and complain about every task they have to do. Men need to step it up!
I truly can’t comprehend it- extremely educated women who clearly took a strategic approach to education and career but not a strategic approach to the lifelong partner they choose to raise a family with?!
My husband was the most important decision I made in my life. I wish more women felt enough agency in their own marriage to expect an equal partner 💙
Also women need to stop putting up with this behavior
Why would they step it up tho? There is no point for them to change as they have nothing to gain by doing so and nothing to lose by continuing leeching off of their wives. It’s not like they don’t know what they are doing. They are not actual toddlers, no matter how much het women would like to believe otherwise. Women need to stop believing that men will magically change if only we educate them on basic human decency. They are not uninformed, they just don’t care.
That’s insane and just affirms this even more how outrageous this whole dynamic has become , and sad.
No wonder women initiate most divorces
Then you have the adjoining dynamic, where if a father takes care of his children he is ‘babysitting’ and if he does any sort of chores he’s ‘doing woman’s work’. I’m gay and not married, but I remember how only a few weeks ago, I was hanging laundry on the line to dry, and some dude in a passing truck slowed down long enough to shout that I’d ‘make someone a good wife.” Good grief, some men just aren’t afraid of contributing. My mom taught six sons to do housework as much as any woman, and good for her for doing so. We’re not slackers.
You sound lovely. Kudos to your mom; she did a great job! 💕
Your mother raised you right! That man in the truck wouldn’t be able to care for himself because that’s “wife work.” smh
@@pixpusha that guys house must have bloody worms if he acts as dumb as he talks
@@samanthacruz9834 If you’re doing everything, you might as well ditch the husband.
Good for you, proud of you!!
And that normalization is what kills relationships. In case a husband is mystified why his wife resents him
And why she doesn’t want to have sex with him….
Yep. If your wife has become “frigid”, it’s time to consider how much you’re putting into household chores, mental labor, etc. because of course she’s not going to want to sleep with a man child. Who would?
@La Reina 50/50 marriages doesn’t stop them from being abusive. I’m positive once women saw they had a choice, they would leave. Sometimes partners aren’t compatible at all and they found out they can’t work through them so they divorced bc it became more normalized. This happened everywhere. Decades ago where my parents came from, your husband could have beat you daily and spit in your face whenever he felt like it, even if he was cheap as hell and her and her kids were starving, she had no right to complain and the word divorce was forbidden to even utter.
Edit for the single celled idiots who cry ‘they knew what they were signing up for 🤡’ have you ever heard of the term ‘liar’? My own narc husband acted like a such a well mannered gentleman but as soon as we were married he took off his mask and did a complete 180. Many people go through this and this goes for both men and women.
A LOT of women suck at communicating with men. They need to lay out their expectations beforehand in plain language and they DONT and it’s so stupid
I love your comment… soooo true… they don’t realize how it takes a few months of r years for the resentment to set in then it is really hard to go back
When we got married we agreed to always thank each other for everything we did around the house or for each other. Whether it was setting the table, mowing the grass, running an errand, vacuuming, etc – we always say thank you. That’s worked for nearly 20 years now. I grew up seeing how little my dad saw what my mom was doing and how undervalued she felt. I didn’t want that. So my husband gets a thank you if he puts away dishes and I get one if I dust the living room. No invisible work here. We see each other’s effort and know how much we do for each other and how much we appreciate NOT having to do things the other has done!
I love this! Gonna take this and implement it asap into my relationship! Tysm:) he’s very attentive, but idk how easy it will be to keep this up for years. Better to make a conscious agreement to keep appreciating each other’s efforts.
@@sourgummiescureyourpain4555 Every once in awhile I mention how glad I am that we do it and how much it means to me. I’m sure it’s a reminder to keep doing it, but it also let’s him know it’s worth the effort. I prefer practicing gratitude for one another. I’m very lucky to have him in my life.
I love this!
My husband actually taught me this as well. He thanked me for every little thing I did for him, as little (and ridiculous😂) as saving a piece of my chocolate for him, he would look at me with sparkles in his eyes and say thank you, that’s when you know he’s genuinely grateful, such a pure heart like a child’s heart 🥹 naturally I picked up this practice because it makes both of us a lot happier. I came from a family where my dad just took and took from my mom and never gave back, there were always tears and resentment, I never knew marriage could be like this. It’s been 10 years but felt like 3. Practicing gratitude is so important in any relationship
I take care of my physically disabled mother and we do the same thing. It really helps me not to get frustrated at doing so much and it helps her feel (in her words) “not useless”. We can’t quite do 50/50 but we at least appreciate what we can do.
This has been a huge journey for me as a man, a partner, and now a father. I’ve always tried to be as equitable as possible with my partner (I consider myself rather progressive) but I’m really putting that to the test now as I’m staying at home with our kid while my wife returns to work. As part of that, i’ve switched to the cooking, cleaning, laundry, and manage all the day to day with my kid. I thought I was “sharing the load” before but oh boy was I wrong. So much of the “executive duties” of a house are completely invisible. They are invisible to most men, still somewhat invisible to even “woke” men like myself, and I think even invisible to many women who have been socialized to do those tasks. I think it’s a huge process for us to navigate as we update from outdated binary gender roles into a much more complex manner of being. You could see why some conservatives would gravitate to the easy of choice of tradition, but I can’t stomach it. I’m willing to put in the work. Any other men with me? Cultivating a new positive masculinity has to be the greatest DIY project ever. Let’s take a few weekends in the garage and hammer it out.
This is why I ended things with my fiance. His parents babied him even in his mid-20’s including paying his bills and for his gas and groceries. I couldn’t even get him to check his own mail. He was a perfectly lovely guy but such a child and when I wanted him to actually grow up he lashed out and said some very hurtful things (that he later admitted were all lies that he said out of fear). I wasn’t willing to marry a child and didn’t want to wait around in the hopes that he might actually grow up some day so I ended things. A year later he thanked me because me breaking up with him was the push he needed to actually go to therapy and become an adult finally. I’m still single and perfectly happy with this arrangement.
You made a good decision. Men don’t generally make changes until you leave them.
@@thepragmatist people*
You don’t have to make this a men exclusive thing
Gives misandry vibes
That dynamic is no accident. It’s the whole reason men marry. It’s exactly what they are signing up for. To have a women to serve them. JUST SAY NO ladies!
Just no lol
Don’t you realise… what do men actually get out of marriage if they have to do all this? Basically, nothing.
Amen
@@maewest68 neither do we get anything out of it,
d u m b a s s
Lmao what part of this are you not understanding? What’s not clicking ????
@@maewest68 if we have to do all of it we’re not getting anything out of it slowpoke and that’s the point 😂😂😂
I remember a dude who I used to work with that was trying to flirt with me told me and I quote “I will make happy and you will do my lunch” and I was like “tf did you say??🤨 If you date me, you are doing your food and doing the dishes too” I can’t even described you how offended he looked like, men have been taught how be useless and they are ok with it
Who raised them?
I remember a dude that liked me that I had absolutely no interest in was talking about what I was going to cook for him & I said I don’t cook for men. Like who even says that to someone you’re not in some kind of closer relationship with?
I feel you! I am sooooo over those types. Biyeeee!!!!!🏃🏽♀️
@@JessicaPradoHanson That’s the only way we (men) will change, if you (women), en masse, decide you’re not putting up with it anymore.
_Nobody_ gives up power voluntarily. If you want power (in this case, a more equal relationship), you have to _take_ it, by force.
And in this case, that means forcing men to change, by refusing to partner up with them if they don’t.
The trouble is, women reach their mid-30s, realise their fertility is diminishing rapidly, and decide to settle, so they can have children. If you know you’re settling, then you have to accept there will be compromises, and your relationship won’t be exactly how you wanted it to be. 🤷🏻♂️
Men know this. We know there are women in their 30s who are willing to marry us, when they wouldn’t have looked twice at us in their 20s.
Until women refuse to settle in their 30s (you don’t need a man to have children anymore), there really is no incentive for us to change.
@@sal2975 nobody. They were coddled.
This is the main reason women initiate divorce 80% of the time.
But men don’t want to have this conversation because it would require them to step up and do the work.
It’s easier for them to blame it on women leaving them for the money most of them don’t have.
That last line 💀
👏👏What you said.⬆️
@Mae West First and foremost, civilization hasn’t even existed for that long, so the concept of “work” like the one we have today did not exist that long ago either. A more correct overgeneralization of that time would be to say that Men who were physically stronger went hunting and protected the group. Meanwhile women searched for fruits and berries, took care and protected the group while the men were gone. The concept of money as a form of currency did not exist, so men were not getting paid for hunting. They were providing food for the family, just like women would do as well, each in their own capacities. You could say that both genders then “worked” in order to provide for the family. In fact, even when civilization started a couple thousand years ago, both genders worked in the field to provide for the family, as 80% of the populations consisted of farmers. It was only during a very short period of time during the industrial revolution where families could afford to have one of the parents stay at home while the other worked to provide for the fanily. And that did not last long either, as economically it is better for both parents to work. This has always been the case.
Well said on ALL Points…….especially the last line LOL!!! I see it wayyyy too often.
Then on top of that men act like going to work is like being a soldier in a war! “I need peace when I get home” sir you’re battling traffic and emails 😂
so you go join the army and leave the man doing your “hard work” equality is what you all feminists want right? well then have it.
I can’t speak for other people’s experiences, but it is rather confusing, frustrating, and disheartening when you have just as much to worry about from your colleagues as from your competition. It only takes a couple bad apples to transform a job from decent to draining.
Also, sometimes it’s hard to ask for help or to open up when you have some false notion that you have to be crushing it all the time and making no mistakes. The only way to never make mistakes is to never do anything risky and potentially enriching – or even just fulfilling
@@megabyte01 millions of women have the exact same experience at work, then come home and start their second shift. Women don’t get to play the “I’m so exhausted from work that I need several hours each night to decompress” card.
@@megabyte01 I understand that as a man as well. I hate that this has come to a men vs. women conversation but when you bring up that concern that you brought up it’s naturally going to be that. But then again this also a conversation about traditional norms. So I don’t take what you say as an excuse but a point to point out. I think women and men go through similar experiences though it’s more amplified for them because they have more to worry about, more to lose. These traditional norms of how to run a household, “leader” etc. need to be looked at. Especially since in 2024 there’s a huge push to bring these norms back.
@@StarryWaters-gq1oj You bring up a fair point about how many women also go through bullshit at work and still have to come home to a second shift at home.
I think it’s healthy to communicate needs and negotiate responsibilities – and also hard to do sometimes when one or both parties are tired from overwork. I don’t mean to make excuses, but to find better solutions by first accurately describing the problem in the first place. If my guess is off, I want to know
The poor way my mother was treated by my father is just the epitome of this issue. He was so abusive to her, making her do everything around the house and only having contact with his kids at his own convenience. He also played the victim when he got called out for it. It’s disgusting, and as a man I’m terribly sorry that many of us are like this. We really need to do better.
Please study about NPD and BPD through Dr.Ramani on YouTube and other YouTube channels and you’ll probably find it helpful!
As a recently divorced mother & software engineer, I’d tell all the single ladies to pay attention to the red flags. They are there. Don’t marry THAT guy
I’m 51 and the youngest of 4 and my mom used to tell me that she wished that she could have just had us kids and not my dad. I know exactly how she felt. I had such a sense of freedom after kicking my ex to the curb after 17 years of raising him