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You Contain Multitudes!
Joe Lilli
There’s nothing wrong with being a stay at home spouse, but I hope younger people realize it requires A LOT of trust!!!! I was a stay at home partner for a few years while focusing on school and it required putting trust in my husband that he would be making financially sound decisions. It also required him to trust that I wasn’t secretly racking up debt and was planning on returning to the work force. Not working makes a person incredibly vulnerable.
“I do think this generation is getting far enough removed from remembering a time when women had no financial independence to now idolize voluntarily choosing that”👏 LOUDER FOR PEOPLE IN THE BACK 👏
This applies to many things nowadays. We forget a lot of our history.
Financially illiterate “pick-me’s”, not cute, just sad
I think detrimental is more accurate. They’re definitely sad, but more accurately their detrimental.
For some of these content creators it’s performative. It’s hard to claim your spouse pays all the bills when your viral videos rake in thousands of dollars.
So those are not even sad (because they’re not true), but they are always detrimental.
@ it’s also deceptive, just like all the rage bait trad wife content where women who make a lot of money doing performative social media cosplay then turn around and tell other women to be disempowered and not make their own money.
“It’s not to say that the woman has to pay the bills, but she should know who has the mortgage, she should have access to all the accounts, she should know what bills are being paid and how much they are, and she should also have her own emergency fund should, for any reason, she has to leave.” 👏👏👏
Agree, finances can create unhealthy power dymanics
Well finances and an unhealthy understanding of relationships.
My husband and I discuss all bills, he handles the mortgage, I handle groceries and the rest of the bills, since I’m a stay at home mother (about to drop another baby any day now.) We discuss if we have enough to put towards vacations, when pet vaccines are due, literally everything. We share an account and can see all transactions so we can be accountable and make changes to our lifestyle if need be.
Agreed. It’s really not the flex that either party thinks it is…
I have always handled all the bills because I saw what happened to my mother when she divorced. She was left not know what bills were due and when, where the money was all kept, how to pay those different bills, and finally if they were even being paid!!! He left her with 3 months due on the mortgage and it going into foreclosure. She knew none of this!!! I will never allow myself to be in that situation. With my husband he has always trusted me with it all but Im reading Ramit’s new book because I think its important he understand all of our finances and what to do if something were to happen to me.
Also even if she’s not the partner who usually handles the finances she should know exactly how and do it every now and then to stay sharp, what will happen if her partner dies and she has no idea about any of it? Chaos
Why is any one person “paying” the mortgage, shouldn’t it be automated from the joint account? Just why. I get an email its going out, it goes out. Why leave it to chance if you’re forgetful?
Never paid a mortgage payment but I was the one to make all arrangements regarding our bills so I knew how to juggle our finances if necessary when he brought home the money. Not having to pay a mortgage is nice.
Not being in the know about finances in your house not so much.
Nothing like ending up homeless as a result of your flippant attitude to your financial well being to teach this lesson real quick. I’ve got me. He’s got me. But just incase he changes his mind, I’ve got me.
THIS IS SO TRUE! AND THANK YOU FOR SAYING THIS! THIS TREND MAKES ME DEEEEPLY UNCOMFORTABLE
A woman that knows how to manage her own money will be a non-negotiable trait when choosing my spouse.
Women I think still do make more than alot of Guys I’m young I barely save I need to control myself I just need to get something I need first
As a young man i hope i get financial stable i cant save money due to wanting to buy i love spending but gotta have more control in tge future
To me it’s just crazy how people (mostly women) today think that women in the past had zero financial knowledge. In a traditional family 50 years ago the husband would give most of his salary to his stay at home wife so she could buy groceries, children’s clothes and all other everyday necessities. This is how I saw my parents and most of my friend’s parents organized their finances over 40 years ago. Oh and btw girls, if you are in a relationship where you feel you will ever need your own emergency fund leave now.
“Oh and btw girls, if you are in a relationship where you feel you will ever need your own emergency fund leave now.”
Horrendous advice. No, have your personal emergency fund regardless of everything else in your life. The point is to have a fall back ready for whatever happens.
By all accounts my aunt and uncle had an ideal very happy loving marriage, it was also very traditional and when he had a heard attack and passed away, she almost lost the house because she didn’t know how or where to pay the mortgage (before auto pay)
Even if everything is amazing you need to know how to pay the bills!
💯 % on Point!!!!
Trends and “jokes” that are predicated on the financial vulnerability of women pmo so much 😤